Originally posted to Facebook on 4/21/11
For some reason, every southern Minnesota town has one. Locals give directions using it as a landmark, people use it as a topic of inane conversation, for example: "You know, back when Hank's Big and Tall used to be in the old Kmart building? When did they move next to Biff's Hooka Emporium? Was that '98 or '99?"
This type of talk began to cause a little itch in the back of my brain back when I lived in Austin/Spamtown since I had no recollection of Kmart ever existing in the old Kmart building. I was often confused and felt stupid when people would refer to said building in such a fashion. I actually got lost going somewhere because I substituted the new Kmart building for the old Kmart building. What a fool's mistake!
Then, once I knew where it was, I started using it like a dumbass. I found myself saying things to younger people like "You know, over by the old Kmart building?" and when they didn't register a response, I'd say "Oh, like where Wendy's used to be?" Jebus, I was turning into one of them!
NOW, many towns have two old Kmart buildings. Here I was in the peculiar situation of still trying to find the old Kmart building in Mankato when the new Kmart closed and created yet another old Kmart building. I think it might be Gander Mountain now? Who can remember.
There's a banquet room in the Verizon Wireless Center here in Mankato that has baffled me in a similar fashion since 1999. I was a lowly Marketing intern planning my first event and everyone kept talking about the "Ellerbe" room as the perfect spot for the sponsors to set up and also to have the happy hour.
I went there for a tour of the facility to plan out the spaces I needed and damn if I couldn't find the stupid room. Well, guess what? They called it the Reception Hall. Apparently, when they built the Mankato Civic Center (as it was called when they built it), there was a historic bank there that was pretty cool and people didn't want it torn down completely, so they kept part of it as a room you can rent out. Guess what? The architect was named Ellerbe and Round or something, so people who have lived here since the dawn of time call the Reception Hall the Ellerbe Room. Sort of like I still call the damn Spam Museum the old Kmart building in Austin.
All I know is, I was pressured into changing my first agenda at my first big event to list the Ellerbe Room instead of the Reception Hall for the happy hour because I was young and thought my elders knew better. Let me tell you, when people can't find their way to the bar, they get huffy. Frickin old Kmart building was back with a vengeance.
Last week I was at an event at the Verizon Wireless Center and someone came up and asked me where the Ellerbe room was. I said: "You're not from around here are you?"
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